Building a Foundation I Never Had: A Story of Family, Healing, and Hope

Growing up without parents, I didn’t learn what most people take for granted—how to give affection, how to set boundaries, how to feel safe. I carried trauma for so long, I didn’t even recognize it anymore. When I became a mother, I promised myself things would be different for my children. But I didn’t yet have the tools to make that promise real.

My son began showing signs of distress when he was just four. He struggled with intense outbursts, anxiety, depression, and PTSD—nightmares that left him shaken, emotional storms that wouldn’t calm. He would also flip desks, throw things. My daughter showed her pain differently—regressing, shutting down, sometimes acting like a cat or a baby to cope.

We tried therapy. But it was short-term. I wasn’t involved. We’d finally make progress, and then the services would end—or the provider would leave. Transportation to the office was a struggle. And my son, after being let down so many times, didn’t want to start over again.

What broke my heart most was seeing them go through the same things I went through. That’s when I realized: if I wanted a different life for them, I had to start with myself. I advocated for help, and through a social worker, we were referred to Wrap Connections at Fred Finch.

At first, I thought it was just for the kids. I thought I’d drop them off and wait to hear how it went. But that’s not how Wrap works. They didn’t just want to fix a problem—they wanted to help us build something sustainable.

Jaime and Natalie from the Wrap team insisted I be part of the process. They were persistent with scheduling, even when I had to cancel or reschedule again and again. They came to me—to our home, to wherever I felt comfortable. They kept showing up, explaining things clearly, helping me understand how this wasn’t just about my kids. It was about our whole family.

They introduced tools and strategies that changed the way we live. One of the most helpful was the "coin system"—a positive incentive game where my kids earn coins for good behavior, redeemable for small rewards. It helped turn discipline into encouragement. We even started playing “What Do You Mean? – Family Edition,” which made us laugh, talk, and connect.

What meant the most to me was the respect and transparency. They didn’t do things for us—they showed me how to do them myself. Wrap gave me a voice. They didn’t dismiss things I’d already tried—they encouraged me to try again, with support and accountability.

Ivan, another team member, even helped connect my son to the local recreation center—a resource I didn’t even know was available. He helped us get a library card. And when times were tough, gift cards from Wrap allowed us to buy games and supplies—little things that made a big difference when I wasn’t working.

I’m carrying the tools into other forums. We brought the “What do you mean” game to my mom who is in sober living. My mom and the other moms loved it—clean fun, something positive to do with our kids. Wrap taught me how to be a mom. Not just a caregiver, but a mom who can cope, connect, and be present.

I am most thankful that they saw me—not just as a parent in crisis, but as a person capable of change. They helped me build a foundation I never had growing up. And now, I can offer that to my children.

Wrap Connections didn’t just change my kids’ lives. It changed mine.

About Wrap Connections:

Wrap Connections is an intensive, community-based program supporting youth and families facing serious behavioral and mental health challenges in San Diego County.

Using a high-fidelity Wraparound model, the program centers each family’s voice and choice—offering services in the home, community, or at a Fred Finch office, based on their preference. Each youth and family is supported by a dedicated team that may include a Care Coordinator, Behavior Counselor, and Parent/Youth Partner, as well as school staff and other service providers.

Wrap Connections offers a wide range of services including mental health assessments, behavioral interventions, medication support, and psychiatric care. The program focuses on building long-term stability and progress across home, school, and community through a culturally responsive and strengths-based approach.

Eligibility is open to Medi-Cal beneficiaries under age 21 who have mental health or behavioral concerns, particularly those recently hospitalized or at risk of losing their current living situation. Referrals can be made by anyone in the community, including schools, therapists, and caregivers.

Learn more or make a referral →For questions about eligibility, please email: wrapconnections@fredfinch.org